I've not found a tidy, all-in-one table of all the C++ 2003 container iterator invalidation rules.

So, with references, here they are!

Insertion

Container Rules 2003 ref.
Sequence containers
vector all iterators and references before the point of insertion are unaffected, unless the new container size is greater than the previous capacity (in which case all iterators and references are invalidated) 23.2.4.3/1
deque all iterators and references are invalidated, unless the inserted member is at an end (front or back) of the deque (in which case all iterators are invalidated, but references to elements are unaffected) 23.2.1.3/1
list all iterators and references unaffected 23.2.2.3/1
Associative containers
set all iterators and references unaffected 23.1.2/8
multiset
map
multimap
Container adaptors
stack inherited from underlying container
queue
priority_queue

Erasure

Container Rules 2003 ref.
Sequence containers
vector every iterator and reference after the point of erase is invalidated 23.2.4.3/3
deque all iterators and references are invalidated, unless the erased members are at an end (front or back) of the deque (in which case only iterators and references to the erased members are invalidated) 23.2.1.3/4
list only the iterators and references to the erased element is invalidated 23.2.2.3/3
Associative containers
set only iterators and references to the erased elements are invalidated 23.1.2/8
multiset
map
multimap
Container adaptors
stack inherited from underlying container
queue
priority_queue

Resizing

Container Rules 2003 ref.
Sequence containers
vector as per insert/erase 23.2.4.2/6
deque as per insert/erase 23.2.1.2/1
list as per insert/erase 23.2.2.2/1

Bootnote

Unless otherwise specified (either explicitly or by defining a function in terms of other functions), invoking a container member function or passing a container as an argument to a library function shall not invalidate iterators to, or change the values of, objects within that container. [23.1/11]

Bootnote 2

It's not clear in C++2003 whether "end" iterators are subject to the above rules; you should assume, anyway, that they are (as this is the case in practice).

(this post can also be found on Stack Overflow)

(also see the same post regarding C++0x)